It’s time to thaw out the Cash Cow!

The Rock Dons Tights

The Tooth Fairy comes out today, and I’m going to see it by myself, without my kids. I know… Ouch. It stars Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson as a minor league hockey player who is forced to get into a tutu. Johnson, who recently starred in such epic films like “The Gameplan” and “Race to Which Mountain?” is the latest in a long line film star celebrities who have turned into Kids Movie specialist. Those who go down this road just don’t come back.

Exhibit A: Brenden Frazier

George of the Jungle, Looney Tunes Back in Action, Dudley Doright, Journey to the Center of the Earth, and now This Side of the Looking Glass. Not to mention teen flix like Blast from the Past, Encino Man, and the Mummy movies. Fraser plays these roles with fervor, and kids love him. Forgive me, but I can’t take him seriously ever again.

Exhibit B: Eddie Murphy

Dr. Doolittle, Dr. Doolittle 2, The Nutty Professor, The Nutty Professor 2, Shrek, Shrek 2, Shrek the Third, Daddy Daycare, Imagine That.
Murphy was great on SNL and the Beverly Hills Cop series, but something went dreadfully wrong after that, and he has kept the kids laughing when the adults stopped. Maybe it was his agent, but the guy has picked some awful roles.

There are others, of course, but these two might serve as a warning to Johnson, who has thrilled some people in other theaters with his action movie prowess. Some have compared him to ARNOLD. If you bring Kindergarten Cop into play, you realize it might be a valid comparison. And a bad omen…